You don’t say?!

Posted April 9, 2009 by Mel
Categories: Joys of being Childfree, News and Views, childfree, childfree encouragement

In my daily rundown of news articles, I came across a particularly interesting one today on MSNBC.com. While the majority of childfree folks already realize that not having kids eliminates a huge stress that is added to a relationship and see it as an added perk, this is news to many others. And while I agree that not having kids does not automatically mean your marriage will be successful (as I am finding out), it does seem to automatically tip the odds in your favor. After all, sadly, many marriages today are not built on firm foundations and once you add a child into the equation, it can go beyond shaking things up. It’s 24/7/365 work, it’s stressful, it leaves less “alone” time, etc. To put it mildly, once you pop out that kid, your life will never be the same no matter how deep you stick your head into the sand and pretend that nothing’s changed.
Childfree couples (married or not) don’t have that stress and limitations. That doesn’t mean they don’t have others unique to each couple, but they don’t have the child-bearing/child-raising stressors. They have more time to focus on each other, they have more freedom to go and do things as they please, etc. Breeders will call this selfish, but whatever.

By the way, I have noticed quite a few news articles pop up lately on the childfree life, sterilization and whatnot in regards to the struggling economy. Unfortunately, I don’t have time to post on each and everyone of them, but has anyone else noticed the same trend?

There Should be Leash Laws for Children…

Posted February 22, 2009 by Mel
Categories: childfree

Sorry for the long absence.  I’ve had a lot going on lately with work, personal issues, etc., but anyway, on to the topic du jour!

I’ve mentioned before that I have shown horses since I was 8 years old.  One of my pet peeves is when people just turn their children loose at these events.  Not only is it annoying, but it is also extremely dangerous both for the kids and others around them.  This is a common complaint among many people but there are many parents who just don’t seem to care.

There have been times where I, as well as other people, have been in the show ring when a bunch kids have gone running up and down metal bleachers.  Sometimes this is even a distraction for the veteran show horses, but with some of the young, inexperienced ones, it can really scare them.

I also hate the attitude that some breeders have that they expect everyone else to watch their kids.  Of course, this is common everywhere but maybe I just notice it more at shows when I’m constantly around 1000 pound animals.  I’ve seen them get into things, ride bicycles right behind a horse, run up and down the barn aisles, etc.  At this point, it’s not just about it being extremely annoying, it’s about SAFETY.  The safety of them, the animals, and other people.  Ironically, the few instances I’ve seen, it never seems to be the kids or their parents that get hurt (not that I want ANYONE to be hurt or put in any danger), but usually one of the riders or horses.

Understand that I’ve been around horses all of my life.  As soon as I could sit up without anyone holding me, my mom had me on a horse.  However, she drilled it into my head that I had to be careful and well behaved around them.  If she caught me so much as running around them, there was hell to pay.  Unfortunately, it seems like a lot of this logic has gone the way of the dinosaurs.  There’s been times it’s been tempting to lock a rogue brat in a stall.

The best sign I ever saw was at a vendor’s booth.  This could be useful in so many places.

children-left-unattended-1219

Television’s Officially Hit Rock Bottom

Posted December 4, 2008 by Mel
Categories: childfree

We all know that television these days can be occasionally…well…disappointing.  However, even on my most desperate days, I can’t imagine anyone willingly watching this.

It’s bad enough that they’re everywhere in the media, but why on earth would anyone want to watch a play by play of this trainwreck.  I mean, why hasn’t her body just gone on strike already?  Hasn’t she worn it out yet?  I can’t stand to think about that for too long as it just makes me do a full body shiver.  And now the breeding shenanigans will be on television.  Cable television has officially hit rock bottom.  How desperate (or deranged) do you have to be to actually want to watch this.  For those that say the childfree aren’t doing their part by contributing to the population, she’s already had our kids for us.  It’s been taken care of.

On the other hand, this could be one of the most effective forms of birth control.  After watching this, you’re just not in the mood anymore.

Happy (Early) Halloween!

Posted October 28, 2008 by Mel
Categories: childfree

This was sent to me earlier today from a friend who saw it on www.extremepumpkins.com and with Halloween being a mere few days away, it was just too good not to share.

Happy Halloween, folks.

Nail head? Meet hammer.

Posted October 15, 2008 by Mel
Categories: Politics, childfree

In the third and final presidential debate tonight, the topic of abortion was finally brought up.  Afterwards, I watched an online video on msnbc.com where they asked Rachel Maddow and Pat Buchanan their thoughts.  Rachel Maddow was completely spot on when she said it comes down to how much say we want the government to have in our reproductive rights. 
See for yourself.

Ms. Maddow, my hat is off.

***Okay, so it looks like there is some technical difficulties with msnbc.com. Instead of clicking the link and conveniently going straight to video, you’ll have to scroll down and select the video “Abortion Highlights Candidates’ Contrasts. Sorry about that, folks.

Do I look like I care?

Posted September 25, 2008 by Mel
Categories: childfree

It seems like lately, everyone has a pregnancy announcement.  I know the reaction that everyone expects to get upon breaking the news is squeals of excitement and joy from all within earshot.  Not me, I just feel the overwhelming urge to upchuck.  I’m sorry (not really) that I don’t get excited and giddy when someone else announces that they too will be popping out a kid.  So you can have sex and get pregnant.  It’s not exactly the hardest thing to do (for most people).  If it were, you would not have as many children running, screaming around restaurants.

I have no maternal instinct.  None.  Nadda.  The thought of having something growing inside of me seriously wigs me out.  It’s enough to make me run screaming from the room.  I know I’m not alone in those thoughts.  So, if you are expecting, goody for you.  Just don’t expect me to start planning your baby shower.  Seriously, if you never told me at all, that would suit me just fine because everytime someone spills the beans about their “condition”, the only thing that goes through my mind is “another one bites the dust.”

A Friendly PSA (not CF-related)

Posted September 22, 2008 by Mel
Categories: FYI, Non-CF

I try not to post too many off-topic posts here, but I figure this could benefit many of my readers, so I’m breaking my own rule.  If you don’t already do so, please consider getting an external harddrive and consistently backing up your files.  Most people don’t think about this until after tragedy strikes and they lose all their files.

Saturday night, I get home and I find that my computer has kicked the bucket.  It had reached the point, it could not even find the harddrive to start up.  I’m sure I could have gotten it fixed, but it was 4 years old, and was already outdated for my needs.  Fortunately, I have an external harddrive and backup software that automatically backs up everything every night, so I lost nothing. However, I know that many aren’t so lucky.  Trust me, it is worth the little bit of initial investment.  It was bad enough having my computer croak, but it would have just added insult to injury had I lost everything.  As it was, I was able to plug my external harddrive into my new computer and there everything was.  Definitely a relief.

I hadn’t planned on replacing my computer quite this soon, but I knew it was coming.  On the up side, I have a new toy to play with.

Politics and Fertility Icons

Posted September 9, 2008 by Mel
Categories: childfree

Has anyone seen this article?

I occasionally talk about my political opinions, but I try not to make this a political blog as the childfree subject matter is sensitive enough without having to pour 5 gallons of kerosene onto the fire.  However, the upcoming US election is obviously a hot topic at home as well as other places.  I hadn’t posted about the Republican VP nominee, Sarah Palin, until now.  Those of you who read my blog regularly probably can figure out what my opinion is of her (pssst…it’s less than favorable).  I was trying to put off posting about it until just the right thing inspired me too, and the above article was the final straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back.

Seriously, a fertility symbol?  Of course, I can’t say that I’m at all surprised as she keeps popping out the kids and her first grandchild will be less than a year younger than her youngest child.  Don’t think about that one too long folks…it’ll make your head hurt.  I highly encourage you to go read the whole thing, but I’ll point out some of the highlights.

Granted, much of this all plays out at a subconscious, even primal (and, therefore, difficult to measure) level, but Palin’s successful mothering of five children, one of whom is now pregnant herself, surely conveys to voters a deeply powerful message of prosperity, health, growth and success.

Did anyone else just throw up in their mouth? You just can’t make this shit up. Seriously? There’s just too much going on in this one, long sentence. “Conveys to voters a deeply powerful message of prosperity, health, growth and success.” Just because you can have kids, doesn’t mean that you’ll have all four of those things. In fact, I tend to think you’ll have quite the opposite in most cases. It just goes with the old “Once you’re a mother your life is complete and that’s the only way your life will be complete” crap that is shoved down our throats day in and day out. And SECOND, I just can’t pass up the opportunity to point out them using the terms “successful mothering” and “one of whom is now pregnant herself” in the same sentence. Uh…WHAT? But excuse me…I guess as long as more babies are being produced, everything is just peachy, it doesn’t matter the circumstances.

What exactly is so “patriotic” about a large family? For starters, bigger is practically always better when it comes to great powers.

Ahh…yes, the ol’ Breed For Your Country ploy. Now, not only is the Right accusing anyone who is slightly Left of being un-patriotic, now they’re trying to imply that if you’re not breeding, you’re not doing your part to help your country. Au contraire!

So, while any portrayal of Sarah Palin as some sort of iconic representation of fertility or fecundity might seem far-fetched, it is entirely possible that the images of her with her five children will have a positive and perhaps fateful impact on voters this November.

If so, it would be the mother of all political success stories.

OMG…there just are no words, NO WORDS. I’m so disgusted by this piece of “journalism” that I, for once have just run out of things to say in addition to being just so miffed (putting it mildly).

And another little tidbit for the masses:

Firmly committed environmentalists and deeply entrenched feminists, to name two important groups, are not likely to respond positively to Palin’s ability to produce a Baby-Boom-sized brood, but they are not the types who would ever vote Republican anyway.

Damn straight. Nice to see you got something right. Give ‘em a cookie…

Have at it!  I know there’s bound to be some hot opinions on this one and I’m really looking forward to the discussion.

Like Fingernails Down a Chalkboard

Posted September 1, 2008 by Mel
Categories: childfree

I’ve discovered there are some child/baby-related phrases out there that just grate on my nerves like nothing else.  I’m sure part of it is because I’m happily childfree and most things pertaining to children/babies/pregnancy either a) annoys b)scares or c) disgusts me, but there are some things that come out of breeders mouths that makes me want to run out of the room screaming.  Let’s get started, shall we?

First of all, the phrase, “We’re pregnant.”  Um…excuse me?  He’s pregnant too?  Wow, that really is a feat.  I’m sorry, but unless both of you are with child, I don’t understand the whole “we’re pregnant” part.  It’s fine to say something along the lines of “we’re expecting a baby” is more acceptable than “we’re pregnant.

My next verbal pet peeve is the phrase, “I’m having his baby” or any of the variations, including but not limited to “I want to have his baby” or “I’m carrying his baby.”  Are there some women out there that have such low self esteem and self worth that they don’t even claim to have any part of this child even though they just put their body through turmoil for 9 months and popped out a kid?  The guy has the easiest job of it all and he gets all the credit??  WTF?

Peeve #3:  “When the babies come…”  OMG…I HATE when people say this (for so many reasons).  The phrase itself makes it sound like a) having children is inevitable and b) they just show up on your doorstep one day, ready to destroy your life.  As my mom always says when she sees breeders with a litter of kids, “This isn’t the Middle Ages.  We know what causes that now.”

Any I’ve missed that just weren’t top of mind?

Add it to the list…

Posted August 26, 2008 by Mel
Categories: Bingos, Rants and Raves, childfree

We all know and come to expect getting bingo’ed from time to time when others discover our non-procreating decision and lifestyle.  We’ve all heard the generic ones “You’ll change your mind,” “But you were a child once too,” “What if your parents had made the same decision,” blah, blah, blah…  However, recently I’ve heard a new one that was used by two different people.   It goes like this:

Them: What?  You don’t want kids.

Me: Nope.

Them:  Well, but you haven’t done anything like, drastic and permanent have you?

Me: Unfortunately, not yet.

Them:  That’s great!  You wouldn’t want to do something permanent that you’d regret!

Me:  Like having kids?

Of course, I realize this is just another round-about version of the “You’ll change your mind” and “You don’t know what’s best for you,” all rolled into one bingo for your childfree convenience.  Has anyone else gotten this one?  What are some of the wackiest bingos you’ve heard?